After joining this community on February 5, 2017, I realized how large it really was, but at the same time, how little I had heard of it. Losing a child(ren) is not something that people speak about often because it tends to make others uncomfortable. But I'm lucky to have people in my life who embrace our twins as members of our family and talk with me about them sometimes.
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| Their footprints were about the size of a small paper clip. |
I can't believe it's been over eight months since I gave birth to our twin boys. So much has happened since then, but not a day goes by that I don't think about them. Some days are harder than others, especially with being pregnant again, but I feel like I'm doing alright considering what a tragedy our family has been through. Losing our boys has made me appreciate what I have even more. When a family goes through a loss, it's unexplainable, but it puts in perspective how precious our family is to us and how quickly things can happen.
There are only three pictures I have of our little boys. I couldn't bring myself to take more in the moment at the hospital. I'm sad that we don't have more, but I'm happy that we have these.
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| Baby B on the left/top, Baby A on the bottom/right |
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| I believe that Baby A's feet are on top of Baby B's feet |
I will never, ever forget the two little guys that were supposed to join our family in the summer of 2017. Instead they decided to make their arrival quite too soon at 19 weeks, 4 days, so we were unable to bring them home. It's weird, in a way though, if it weren't for their passing, we wouldn't have Little Brother growing right now.
I still am struggling with "everything happens for a reason". That used to be something I really thought was true, until this happened. I cannot think of a reason that this would happen to our family, but as much as it sucked, we have learned to accept it as part of our reality.
We love you so much, Baby A and Baby B. We promise to keep you in our hearts and memories forever! ~Mommy, Daddy, Anna and Little Brother
My mother used to say "everything happens for a reason" too... and "life's not fair and you don't always get what you want" as well. Maybe the reason why this happened is that there was something not quite right with your twins and if they hadn't passed when they did, they would have struggled unimaginably when born. After I miscarried, my mother said it was natures way of dealing with something that wasn't quite right. You will never forget them, and the hurt will fade, but now you have a the little life to focus on. Best wishes for what lies ahead.
ReplyDeleteHugs, friend.
ReplyDeleteThank you <3
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