Thursday, August 18, 2011

Losing Hope, But Gaining Motivation

Well, let's face it - it's more than half way through August, most schools have started this week or will be starting next week and I still don't have a teaching job...I'm losing hope. On Monday, I was all pumped about still applying because I was so sure that I was going to get one of those last minute positions that come up. So I emailed over twenty principals about job postings, and I've applied over and over each day online, and all of the responses I've gotten are ones saying, "Thanks for applying, but that position has been filled. Try again next year." They don't exactly say 'try again next year' but pretty much. It sucks. I'm more upset at the fact that I'll have to go through this entire (May-August) application process again next year. It's so frustrating! But, I'm very excited that I still have my teaching assistant job that I had last year, at the same amazing school. :-)  I absolutely love the school I worked at last year (it's where I did my student teaching, too). I'm excited to go back and see all of the kids, and start getting the educator part of my brain going again - it feels so good!

Another positive about me keeping my assistant job is less stress. I think that whenever I get my first teaching job ("maybe next year" -- man, I feel like a Cub's fan!), I'm going to be so stressed out about doing everything right. As an assistant, I still try to do my best with everything I do with the kids, but I definitely don't have as many responsibilities as a classroom teacher.

I think this will be a good time for me to really focus on my health and exercise. Not having the added stress of my own classroom is giving me extra motivation to kick my butt with treatments and exercise. I have a doctor appointment next Thursday - a week from today - so I'm really anxious to see what my PFTs are. I haven't been exercising like crazy, but I've definitely been doing more the past couple weeks than I ever have, so I'm hoping that's helped. I've also been completely compliant with my treatments for three weeks straight - which doesn't sound like much, but it's always been harder for me to get both treatments in on the weekends with stuff going on, but I haven't missed one in three weeks! :-)
If my PFTs don't go up, I'm going to be really bummed because I feel like I've been working my butt off. But I just need to keep doing what I'm doing and I think, and hope, that I'll start to see some awesome results. :-)

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